At the meetings we will eat ice cream

I want to start a Fat Ass club. Who's with me? We can make a specific day every week that we eat ice cream, or cake, or OH! Ice cream cake! And we can bitch about Lindsay Lohan checking herself into a fat spa with Kate Moss. And threaten to break them over our knees. Then we can talk about how women that have only gained 8.5 pounds by the third trimester are going to have stunted babies and should be tied down and force fed. We'll feed them fattening food, but stuff that tastes bad as punishment. We can dance around and shout Towanda while we drive our vehicles into those of skinny moms. It'll be great.

EDIT: The first rule of Fat Ass Club is you do not weigh yourself. (The second rule of Fat Ass Club is you do not weigh yourself)