I Am Jack's Raging Mommy

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Wednesday, August 24, 2005

Suspenders and a Belt

I am in a particularly foul mood, which is odd considering I've had a fairly good day, and don't dislike being married. Or the nookie. But anyway.

Joe and I made our reservations for our honeymoon-let this weekend. We are going floating and camping for two nights, sans baby. My parents are going to sit, so we plan on getting drunk and having a lot of sex. Thought you'd like to know. Two nights of camping, one float trip on a raft (as opposed to canoe or tube) and 6 meals between us came to a grand total of $116. Far less than a hotel and far more fun. But we are people who like spending the night in a tent and floating on a river for 6 hours. I love floating actually, I haven't been in a couple years, so I'm really very excited. I want it to be Friday now, but I need Thursday to happen so I can go get my Depo shot and not provide a honeymoon-let baby.

Funny side note that SJ has already heard all about:
I have a condition called Factor Five Leiden Gene Mutation that causes all sort of great fun like deadly emboluses. (Emboli?) It can also increase the risk of Ectopic pregnancies, placental abruption, and eclampsia. Joe's mom made a comment about when a woman is pregnant she is at her healthiest (she was criticizing me about something) and I so wanted to retort that pregnancy is when I am closest to dying. I took heparin throughout the pregnancy, and saw a high risk Ob/Gyn as well as my regular doc. I'm fine, Jack is fine and we don't need to test him until he's two years old.
What all this scary creepy talk means is that I can't take the Pill.
Ever notice how all those commercials list blood clots and stroke? Yeah. Every single kind of the Pill. I can however take Depo, but the FDA has put a "black box" warning on Depo now since it causes osteoporosis. So I can die, rot my bones, or have lots of kids. In case you chose to point out some of the other options, let me just say there is ample evidence to suggest that "at the moment" birth control is not something I am so good at.

I am actually quite proud of myself. This didn't turn into some huge rant about things I'm not actually mad about just because I was in a funk. I sort of ranted a bit, but as there are no curse words I count this post as a ray of sunshine.

I haven't got the photos uploaded yet, and I discovered that Flickr is a bitch on dialup. Damn, I cursed. Oh, what the hell. FUCK. I mean, I may as well have fun with it, and scare off the trolls. Hi Trolls! Fuck you!

I'm stopping now. I need liquor.
Have a nice night, Internet!


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