Ok, now I got myself all pissed off

See, I was going to try to write a post about the adoption of my older son, but then someone criticized my last post and I tried to respond nicely but I'm cranky at the telemarketers, and I'm tired and basically I have just managed to get mad.

I like that people read my site. I love that people look forward to my posts, and I feel really shitty about all the gaps recently with my depression and broken computer. Instead of writing again about my depression and broken computer I thought I'd write about something that I find interesting and that other readers had asked me about. So it kind of pisses me off that someone would criticize that. I mean, if you want another "I have nothing to say and no motivation and nothing I care about" post then just skim over the last couple of months, or find some emo kid. I'm making an effort here.

I've never gone on someone else's site and complained about what they decided to write about. If it didn't interest me I didn't read it, and if it kept up like that I just stopped reading altogether. These people don't owe me anything and to be frank I don't owe anyone anything.
I try to be funny, biting, clever, entertaining, etc. But that is all my choice, and if I fail in being any of these things then that is my fault. I'm sorry if you don't like what I write about, but a computer is a lot like a television, you have a choice in what you look at.

And I'll finish by saying if the comment wasn't meant in the very harsh way that I took it then I am sincerely sorry for biting your head off and being incapable of taking a joke. It's that kind of morning.

Lets try this again?

Newly repaired new laptop is now in my possession. But I don't have Playboy, and I can live with that.

I recently got addicted to Gilmore Girls. I was bored one day at 4 pm and I thought to myself "I'll watch Gilmore Girls. Nothing else is on, and people talk about it as if it is really good". I never looked back. Though coming in partway through the re-runs on the Family Channel and the new episodes on the WB, there's a bit of confusion. Exactly why did Rory steal a boat? Did she quit school before that? Was Sookie married to Jackson from the beginning of the series or did I miss that? I've also seen none of Rory dating Jess or Dean before he got married. But I'm hooked nonetheless. The re-runs are catching up with the new episodes which makes me happy since they should rotate back around to the beginning of the series then.

To answer though? I do not like Logan. I do believe that he thought they were broken up when he slept with the bridesmaids, but still. He's just... slimy. He has the whole entitlement thing going on, and he really doesn't give a damn about people he views as being beneath him.
I don't see a lot of viable alternatives for her though.
Also? Paris dating Jonathan? (He was Jonathan on Buffy so Jonathan he remains) I LOVE that. It's just too good. Also I recently realized that Paris played David Krumholtz's wife on ER when he was the schizophrenic who stabbed Carter and Lucy.

Suzan, I'll email you what I do about the search mongers.

So, I'm back.... again... let's see if this works.

Whiplash

So back in High School (my ten year reunion is arriving. Gulp.) I was in the Marching Band in the Flag and Dance Corp. No, our Band Camp was nothing like the one in American Pie. At any rate, our flag director was pretty cool. We played Zeppelin, and Iron Man, and a lot of other things that I didn't get at the time but later realized how awesome it was. We had a tradition that during Iron Man we would all headbang. I once gave myself whiplash doing this. It rocked.

I used to blast my music, and loved the saying "If it's too loud, you are too old". Wil Wheaton mentioned once on his blog that he now totally gets the irony, as he, like me, finds it much too loud nowadays. The difference being that we never played our music so loud it could be heard two blocks away, or had the bass so high it rattled other cars. I just don't get it, you can't actually hear the music with the bass that high. And if you are in the car why do people over a hundred yards away need to be able to hear every word as well?

So I realize, yes, I am turning into an old fogie. I actually catch myself thinking of teenagers as "Hooligans". They play in the back and I'm tempted to tell them to stay off my lawn. Now, correct me if I'm wrong, but isn't that supposed to be a truly old person thing to do?

Sometimes I think it is a decline in personal responsibility and courtesy. The way I was raised I would never have behaved the way kids do in front of their parents. I'd of gotten my ass whipped. But then again spanking and even saying "no" have gone so out of vogue that it doesn't surprise me. If kids learn there is no negative consequence for behaving inappropriately then why the hell wouldn't they?

I think it also has a lot to do with money. I don't mean rich people, but money given without being earned. How many of us actually had to do chores and yard work and the like to earn our allowances? That's not the case anymore, and so kids think that things should be handed to them out of some sort of right or entitlement. Over the 13 years I've been working I've seen a downward slide in the work ethic of teenagers. Whenever I meet on who actually work, and try, even if their quality isn't the best, it impresses me to no end. It's got to be better than their peers who do nothing and expect a paycheck anyway.

I was at the gas station earlier and someone was blasting music. Those of us in the checkout got into a conversation about it's stupidity and it got me thinking of how much I've changed since I was in school. I jokingly tell people I used to party with how boring I am now, but like most jokes it's based in truth. I don't know the last time I smoked pot (which is a good thing) or stayed out all night partying (again, good). But the thing is, while I know that it's good to grow up, I miss it sometimes. The freedom, the hedonsim, the laughter.

I just want a little debauchery over now and then. Is that too much to ask?

Update on my wonderful life at the moment

So my brand new laptop?
The touchpad is broken. (Which is why none of the book updates have links). I have to mail it back to Dell and I don't know how long it will take to get it back.
Otherwise things are pretty good. Joe just god a new job that he likes better than the old one, which will mean I get to cut back on my hours at work. It's nice how these things can solve themselves every now and them.

We are getting a new mattress, and we already got a new TV and entertainment unit. When I have a computer that doesn't take me a half an hour to get anything done I'll post some pics.


Jack will be a year old at the end of the month and my eldest will be 9. I'm kind of freaking the fuck out over here, you know?

April Books

April 1-12
Echoes- Maeve Binchy*
Tara Road- Maeve Binchy*
Good Omens- Neil Gaiman and Terry Pratchett*
My Dream of You- Nuala O'Faolain*

April 13-30
Ya Yas in Bloom- Rebecca Welles
Good in Bed- Jennifer Weiner
Flabbergasted- Ray Blackston
Firefly Summer- Maeve Binchy *
Eldest-Christopher Paolini
The Return Journey-Maeve Binchy*
Copper Beech- Maeve Binchy*
The Lilac Bus/Dublin Four- Maeve Binchy*
Quentins-Maeve Binchy*
Evening Class-Mave Binchy*

* Re-read

muck

So this morning I got to do something that I haven't done in forever. I got to sleep late. It was wonderful. Work did call at 8:30 in the morning to try to get me to go in early but I basically told them to fuck off. But nicely!

Work itself was a really short shift, which was good because I was a raging bitch today. I kept biting everyone's heads off, and even snapped (inadvertently) at a customer. (I heard a question behind me and snapped an answer thinking it was another employee. It wasn't.)
I didn't take my meds this morning so I am hoping that's all it was. I'll have three days off after tomorrow so Hopefully I can regenerate somewhat. I changed it so that I don't work evenings anymore, but somehow it hasn't effected the number of hours I work every week. I don't want to quit, but I need to figure something out so I don't burn out.

I've been depressed (no secret, I have my new laptop and I'm still not posting properly). I'm just in that I can't get anything done phase, and other than small variations, I have been for quite some time. I mean, how many times have I written this exact post in the past few months? Too many for comfort. I do like to think I can be entertaining.
It just mostly feels like I need something huge to change, or for everything to just pause. I'm tired of just wading through every day, and each week and it all just bleeds and blends into itself.

I'm not sure what it is I want to do.

1:23, 4/5/6

In about an hour something will happen that will never happen again in history, (except from twelve hours from now if you don't use military time).
The time and date combination will be 123456.
I just thought it was really cool and I'd share :)

Bullshit!

I love Bullshit! I mean, this is a really great show. I am beginning to suspect that Penn Jillette is a genius. Sure, it's easy to watch an episode like the one on Ghost Busters and know that it's bullshit and to agree with them, but when they can make a liberal like me change my stance on gun control? That' some serious mojo right there.
The new season started last night and I'm watching the episode on the Boy Scouts right now. (I also love my DVR) They actually have me upset enough to write to my representatives requesting they take a stance against the public funding of the Boy Scouts. I mean, sure, if they were a truly private, Mormon church run organization they could exclude anyone they like. This is America, they get to do it, and we get to say we don't like it. However, once they receive public funding they lose that right because you can't use tax dollars to discriminate. Just watch the episode. They explain it much better than I could.

Another cable show I am really digging on is Big Love. We got the free weekend of HBO, and I was already missing it from when we had it up in Omaha, so when I saw this show I was like "Ok, we're getting HBO again". So their little ploy worked, but seriously, it is that good of a show. Damn hilarious. Though I doubt it will convince me polygamy is cool. I don't mean polyamory, which works for some people, including my best friend Allan, but old school Mormon polygamy where they marry off girls at fourteen to their uncles. Not that the main character family is in that situation, but they are former members of a compound who do still practice those beliefs.

This is turning into the Mormon post. In that theme I will tell you a small anecdote from work. We got this new employee, who I was told before I'd met her "S is gay! She just came right out and said it! Can you believe that!". Have I mentioned how much I like bigots? You talk about your boyfriend. Get over it. Anyway, once I started working with S I found out her family are practicing Mormons. So I asked her about "garments" (the holy underwear). She was a little embarrassed, but admitted, yes, she'd worn them in the past. She's inactive now, which considering the Mormon church's position on homosexuality is totally understandable.

Basically I guess this post is saying I like gay people, and not fundamentalist Mormons. So nothing new, right?
I think it's just the thrill of being able to post again :)

Lust

OH MY GOD.

I got my new laptop today, even though it wasn't initially supposed to even ship until tomorrow. Am I complaining though? Hell to the NO I am not! It's so pretty, and sleek, and light, and the screen is SO much bigger and clearer that my old one... I'm in lust. I'm pretty sure I've got tingly sensations in my private parts.

I'll need to take a picture, even though it's the laptop in my background, but this one will be mine, not some random Dell photo of a laptop like mine. There's a difference. Also, I've already noticed that the keyboard layout is a lot better for my hands. This is nice.

Oh, and before I forget, on the ER two Thursdays ago they said my real name. One of Morris'' kids had my name. Did anyone notice the names? Any guesses as to which one was mine?
I was thrilled since it's only the second time I've ever heard my name on TV when it wasn't specifically about me, and the first time I've heard it in a TV series. It rocked.

Wow.
I am in such a good fucking mood right now. Lets get drunk. Are you with me internet? Break out the alcoholic beverage of choice and help me celebrate the new computer. Maybe later you'll get a drunken rambling post. Those are always fun :)